Filling out Your Online Dating Profile

So you've decided to try online dating. You've signed up with one of the online dating sites, but now you're not sure what to do. That profile page seems so... empty. You want to put forth the most attractive version of yourself, but you don't want to seem desperate. Don't worry; we'll help you out. Here, you'll find some tips on building your online dating persona:

Know What You Want

Begin by choosing the appropriate online dating service for you. If you're looking for a long-term relationship, investigate a site like PerfectMatch.com. But if casual dating and short-term intimate encounters are more your speed, a site such as Date.com might be a better choice for you. When you start filling out your profile, consider the kind of person you want to attract. It might help you to make a list beforehand of the attributes you're seeking in a partner: well-read, open-minded, good-looking, and so on. Then write in your profile about who you are and why you deserve the partner you want: Are you a bookworm? A movie buff? An explorer looking to share your adventures? Give concrete examples to show that you're not bluffing.

Choose a Picture

Having no picture at all signals that you're trying to hide something, but for the love of Pete, don't use a photo from 20 years ago! Sure, you might look better then and get more messages and profile views, but when it comes time to meet, your picture won't matter; your dishonesty will. Do you wish you were 30 pounds lighter? Mention elsewhere in your profile that you're dieting and exercising to lose the weight. Do you wish you had more hair? Poke a little fun at yourself—humor has more of a positive impact than baldness is negative. Use a current photo that shows you at your best: happy, by yourself, in an outfit you love, at your favorite hangout. Let your personality shine through!

Don't Miss a Thing

Fill out the whole profile—yes, the whole thing. It might take some time, but you want to look like you put some effort in, right? No need to compose a treatise on yourself, just give us the basics, the activities and issues that are central to your personality. A complete profile will help potential matches find you or help the service suggest you to other users. The same holds true in the event of a service like eHarmony, which has you answer a litany of questions before you can begin seeing matches. Finish what you start!

Check Your Spelling

... and your punctuation, and your grammar. You're smart, so act like it! You don't have to make it professional-quality, but you don't want to come off as an ignoramus. A long, drawn-out, run-together sentence on your online dating profile, for example, will confuse your potential matches and drive them away. 

Be Honest

The nicest, shiniest, most attractive online dating profile in the world won't matter one whit if it's packed with lies. Tell the truth about who you are, what you do, what you like, and what you don't like, even if you're afraid of exposure or rejection. Without candor, you're wasting everyone's time, and you won't find the person you're looking for. Put your best foot forward in an honest way. If you're unemployed, admit that you're out of work, but perhaps outline in which industry you're job hunting. Self-conscious about your age? Confess, but counter it with how old you feel and why (example: "Running two miles every day helps me stay young at heart!"). There's a silver lining in every cloud.

Here's an example of a fully fleshed-out profile:














 

You're just getting started, so a few small mistakes are bound to happen here and there. But if you put in the effort, you'll soon learn what works and what doesn't, and you'll be well on your way to online dating satisfaction!

 

 

Online
Dating
Site
Chemistry.com

Bottom line: Intuitive matching system based on complementary personality types, best for those seeking committed relationships
Match.com

Bottom line: Large and active group of users, intelligent matching system based largely on similar tastes and interests
eHarmony

Bottom line: Emphasis on guidance and deep connections, larger users base seeking committed relationships, some people are not accepted
Zoosk

Bottom line: Fun and playful; great social features; premium features somewhat available without a subscription
PerfectMatch.com

Bottom line: Designed for those seeking committed relationships, combines elements of matching and searching, personality test is less informative
FriendFinder

Bottom line: Customizable experience, overwhelming & frustrating interface, best for people with flexible relationship goals and a lot of time on their hands
Lavalife

Bottom line: Emphasis on flirting and chatting, good for casual dating, slightly more explicit content, interface cluttered with ads
Date.com

Bottom line: Very basic service with instant messaging and chat rooms, best for casual dating, identical to Matchmaker.com
SpeedDate

Bottom line: Constant stream of speed dates, matchmaking "system" yields poor results, nonstop harassment to subscribe
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